Unconditional Love

Is the ability to love unconditionally just something that happens when you meet the right person, or is it something that you need to grow in? Maybe its just cause I am human...or maybe I just suck at it...but I really think this is an area I need to grow in, and I am not sure how! And I don't know if I am the only person in the whole world that feels like this...

I mean, I know we are all selfish. I certainly am. Its easy to feel like the whole world should exist to make ME happy. And I fight so hard not to be like that. I want to desperately care for others' needs more than my own. I want to desperately give to others all that I have, if it will make them happy. I want to desperately love everyone that crosses my path, although that certainly can be a challenge. But loving unconditionally...that's huge. And I am scared I don't know how to do that!?

If I meet someone amazing...I feel like I can always find little things about them that should be changed. Now...sometimes thats ok, because I also want people in my world who love me to be able to help me grow and become a better person in areas that I need it. But it can so easily cross the line into nagging them to death. And...nagging is actually something that the bible repeatedly talks about!! The amount of times in Proverbs that it talks about how bad nagging is is amazing to me. Although...I guess this means that God knew it was a problem (sadly, mostly for woman!!), even 2000+ years ago. If I have learnt anything...its that nagging doesnt work. It can be incredibly destructive to a relationship. So...there has to be a better way.

Imagine a relationship where both people love the other person unconditionally. If both people spend their lives putting their needs to the side, in order to love and bless and please the other person...surely both people win!? If a husband (no stereotype meant) goes out of his way to put the rubbish out, even if he doesn't feel like it, because he knows it will please his wife...then she wont need to nag him. If a wife allows her husband to watch sport on a Saturday afternoon, and even sits down and watches it with him, even if she doesn't really want to, and makes the effort to enjoy it...I wonder if the love will just naturally start to grow between them more and more?

So what can I do people? How can I learn to love unconditionally? Is it some magic thing that just happens when I meet Mr Right? Or...maybe its something I need to keep practicing everyday. From NOW. I suspect its not an instant thing. I think, like anything, its something that takes practice. Really learning to be that living sacrifice and put my needs/wants/opinions to the side, and put someone else's first. Accept that noone is perfect (CERTAINLY not me) and therefore, just as Christ chose to love me with all my faults...learn to look beyond the superficial imperfections and love the depth of the person inside. Choose not to point out someone else's mistakes, but encourage them instead. And keep seeing the potential in them. Actually go out of my way to do things that I don't really want to do, because it will make someone else happy.

Unconditional love is hard. But all good relationships (especially marriages) need it to be at the centre of the relationship. So...I guess I better start practicing now...