The donkey said what??!!

God can speak to us in so many different ways. Today I was reading about how God spoke through a donkey in Numbers 22. This really challenged me to be open about how I can hear from God. Some people expect only to hear from God with their ears, like a loud booming voice from the sky. Some people only think God speaks in whispers, so they need to isolate themselves to hear Him. Some people feel His peace. Some people hear Him through others. Some through the bible. And in the case of Balaam...God used a donkey.

Unfortunately for Balaam...he didnt realise what was happening. He didn't realise it was God. So everytime the donkey saw the angel of God and stopped, Balaam beat the donkey. But then the funniest thing happened. (I love the bible sometimes...it really cracks me up.) This is what it says... "Then the Lord opened the donkey's mouth and she said to Balaam "What have I done to you to make you beat me 3 times?". Balaam answered the donkey "You have made a fool of me! If I had a sword in my hand, I would kill you right now".

OK...lets just stop for a moment. Balaam tells the donkey that she made a fool of him. IMAGINE how much more of a fool he looks talking to a donkey!!! Anyways...the conversation with the donkey continues...
"The donkey said to Balaam "Am I not your own donkey, which you have always ridden, to this day? Have I been in the habit of doing this to you?" And Balaam replies "No". Oh thats the hightlight for me!! Not only is Balaam talking to the donkey...the donkey puts him in his PLACE! Bam! Whats a hilarious sight this would have been. But then it says "Then the Lord opened Balaam's eyes..."

I kind of get the feeling that up until that point Balaam didnt realise that God was involved in this interaction. I mean...really?! How often does your donkey just start talking to you?! I would have fallen off my donkey at the first word...but Balaam is so mad that he cant even see the situation for what it is. How many times have you been so focused on your situation. So filled with emotion or frustration or confusion that you cant sense God talking to you, right where you are at. Sometimes it might be a closed door that you are angry about. Sometimes someone might challenge you on something and you get offended. Sometimes...like in the famous story, you are sitting on the roof and God sends you a helicopter, but you are so busy looking out for God that you miss Him!

God speaks to us in so many ways. He does speak to us in all the ways I listed at the start. Through a voice, a whisper in our hearts, the bible, other people. Just be open (and use wisdom and discernment, of course) to how God wants to speak to you or reveal himself to you. You might be going through a season where you aren't hearing from God. And yes, those seasons do exist (I think I wrote a blog last year about that...) but sometimes its because you are expecting Him to speak to you only in a certain way. Maybe its the way He spoke to you last time. But sometimes God wants to mix it up a little...to make us keep trusting Him. If everything is how we expect it and we get safe and comfortable in that, our need for faith lessens. So maybe God wants to do it a little different this time. So...be open and ready to hear from God no matter how it may present itself. But let me give you a heads up...if a donkey starts speaking to you, don't bother arguing back!!

Stand in the Gap...

Moses must have been ONE patient man. I mean...seriously, those Israelites were complainers! Whinging, whining and grumbling all day long. I would hope that if I got to see the miracles they saw, and if I got to tangibly see God's clouds and presence like they did, I would live in awe and not complaining! Actually even God got angry at them. And Moses knew it. In Numbers 16:46 Moses tells Aaron to hurry up and make atonement for the people because "Wrath had come out from the Lord; the plague had started".

So rather than saying "OK God...go for it! These people are driving me crazy too!! Knock 'em out" what does Moses do? It says "He stood between the Living and the Dead" (Numbers 16:48). Wow. What a man of God. No wonder God chose him!!

But you know what...God is calling us to do the same with His people today. God needs us to stand in the gap between the people that know and are alive in Him, and those that aren't and are seemingly dead in this world. He needs us to fight for those that are dead inside, and don't know God. How easy it would be to just step aside and let "nature take its course". Spend all our days focused on ourselves and what WE need for God. But God needs us to stand up for those in need. Those who are hungry, lost, hurting...maybe even those who are just living with a sense of "numbness". Who have no sense of the awe and might of God.

I don't know what "standing" for them looks like for you. Maybe its giving a smile to someone. An encouraging word. Food. Shelter. Love. Maybe its writing a blog or a book or a card when God prompts you too, so others can sense His love and goodness. Whatever it means to you...just remember that there is power in standing in the gap. The whole of Israel could have been wiped out by God in one moment had Moses not had the compassion and boldness and willingness to stand between the dead and the living. Now its time to take our stand.

PS. I am not sure that God really would have taken out the whole of Israel. Its hard to know. God's wrath is pretty powerful. But He's also a loving and compassionate God. Maybe it was something that Moses had to sense in order to stir something inside of him. To trigger the response God needed him to have. Just food for thought...

My God, My God...does He forsake me?!

"My God, My God, why have you forsaken me". Most people who have read the bible, or even know anything about Jesus dying on the cross know that this is the last words He said. Jesus' famous last words. Up until recently I just assumed that Jesus was talking to God. That He has taken on the world's sins and was now separate from God, and He was crying out about this.

But you know...that doesn't sit right with me. How can we read in the bible that God is a forgiving God. That He promises to "never leave us, and never forsake us" if here he was, abandoning his own son at his greatest time of need.

But lucky, as a recent preacher taught me, that's not exactly the end of this story. As I learnt, back in the bible days, they didn't have the luxury of saying "hey, you know what it says in Psalm 22". They didn't have chapter and verse numbers. Often they used the first sentence of the chapter as a way of referencing for people to know what they were talking about. So if I said "In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth", everyone would know I was talking about Genesis 1.

So what I didn't notice until this preacher pointed it out is that Psalm 22 is referenced in the bible as linking to where Jesus says these famous last words. And if you turn to Psalm 22, how do you think it starts? Yep..."My God, My God, Why have you forsaken me". Psalm 22 then goes on to to in a sense to prophesy about what Jesus would go through. That yes, maybe to Jesus God felt silent as He was taking on the consequences of the WHOLE world's sin. Yet that Jesus still trusted God. That He knew that people cry out to God and are saved. That they trust Him and are not disappointed. That although Jesus would be mocked and insulted...Jesus would still trust God, and that He knew God would rescue Him. That although they pierced his hands and feet, took all his clothes..."He had NOT hidden his face from him, but had listened to his cry for help" (verse 24). That because of this all of the world would rejoice, would remember and turn to the Lord. That future generations would be told of the Lord.

So no...Jesus wasn't crying out to God because God had forsaken and abandoned him. He was crying out to the people, to remind them of Psalm 22...and to remind them that God never leaves us, always hears out cry, and that Jesus knew was he was doing would set the world free.

To me...that makes the story have a MUCH more powerful ending. And it reminds me of God's promise never to forsaken or leave us. If He still heard Jesus' cry, who at that point had more sin on him than any of us ever can...how much more will He always hear our cry. God never leaves us. If you feel like God has moved away from you....stop and look around, and you will quickly realise that its you that moved. God is still listening to your cries. He never stops. He is just waiting for you to come back to Him.

It wasn't my idea...

In Numbers 16: 28 Moses says "This is how you will know that the Lord has sent me to do all these things and that it was not my idea"...and then the earth splits open and swallows up a whole bunch of people, just like Moses said it would. This verse really reminded me that my life should be a reflection of God's miracles and testimony, and not of my striving or effort.

As I am on the journey of figuring out visas and where my life is about to go, I need this reminder. It would be so easy to run ahead and try to figure things out, and make them happen in my own strength. But I don't think that's how God wants it to happen. I think that...He wants my life, and your life, to be a testimony of His plans. Which can sometimes mean that things happen at the last minute. Well, last minute according to OUR timing and stress levels. But perfect according to his timing.

I am reminded how I wanted to tell one of the pastors back home that I was leaving to go to Africa and USA. I wanted to tell him because I respected him, and wanted that accountability and "release", in a sense. But I couldn't seem to get to tell him. I never saw him. None of my emails worked. It just seemed like it wasn't going to happen. And just when I made peace about that on the last night before I was leaving...God allowed me to walk through the same doorway as him at the same time. Perfect timing. Perfect opportunity. Some people might think it was just a "coincidence", but I don't believe in coincidences. Not when they happen ALL the time, in God's PERFECT timing, and PERFECT way. For me, that moment was a very clear revelation that what seemed like last minute was in fact God's perfect timing and planning. That He doesn't forget. And He is never late. And that what is important to me is also important to Him. A lot of revelation from one simple doorway conversation, hey? That's how I know it wasn't a coincidence.

So...again I now stay on the journey of trusting God with my visas. Trusting Him to show me how He wants everything to happen. And even when it feels late, it wont be. It will simply show that "the Lord has sent me to do all these things and that it was not my idea".

The Cloud

So in my one year bible I have been plodding along through Numbers. Not the most exciting of books, mind you...but today I was reading Numbers 9:15-23. In summary, it says "On the day of the tabernacle, the Tent of the Testimony was set up, and the cloud covered it...Whenever the cloud lifted from above the Tent, the Israelites set out; whenever the cloud settled, the Israelites encamped...When the cloud remained over the Tabernacle a long time, the Israelites obeyed the Lord's order and did not set out...Whether the cloud stayed over the tabernacle for two days or a month, or a year, the Israelites would remain in the camp and not set out; but once it lifted, they would set out".

This passage reminded me that there are seasons in our life where it feels like we are on the move...really moving forward and feeling change and direction in our lives. And yet there are other times where it feels like we are stuck and not going anywhere!

Both seasons bring their challenges. When you are moving, like it feels like I have been doing over the last 6-9 months, its fantastic. You feel growth and freshness and new beginnings in life. As the wind blows through your hair, you can feel the stale cobwebs fly away as new adventures or experiences enter your world. Whether its a new job, a new country or a new relationship...its exciting to feel like you are moving forward. But...change can also be scary. It can take a lot more trust when it feels like you are on the move, yet you have no idea whats around the next corner. It can be hard to not know when the adventure will stop. It can be challenging when many things change at once and you lose your sense of stability. Sometimes it can even be exhausting and you may feel like you just want to stop and process whats happened and sit still for a while.

And then before you know it, "the cloud" settles and you stop. And this season can also be challenging. Yes, there is consistency and predictability which can be comforting. And if you are enjoying your life, it can be nice to have things pleasant and the same for a while. But then...its also hard when you feel like you want to move forward but you cant. When your impatience starts and you feel like blowing the cloud to get it moving. When it feels like you have camped so long that you wonder if maybe the cloud got stuck up there!

But God knows the importance of seasons. Sometimes, He wants us to keep moving, even when we are tired. He wants us to enjoy the new experiences and opportunities He is bringing us. But sometimes He calls us just to stop and wait. Maybe its to give us rest. Maybe its for protection because we don't know whats ahead and we aren't yet ready. Maybe its to teach us patience. But whatever the season....it will change soon. No season lasts forever. So don't fight it. Stay obedient, and don't be tempted to sit when the cloud is moving, or sneak out from under it and run whilst its settled. Just be patient and wait for Gods guidance and timing.